It sucks, isnt it? To be drifted apart from someone that once meant so much to you....

I know it sucks. No more sparks,no more special events where you guys can meet up and laugh mostly about everything that happens in life, we just go to our separate paths, hoping that either one of us could actually bring up the memories and tell us it is hard to let go of those memories. That particular feeling of having a gap in your heart that once owned by that particular someone, but now its empty. It sucks.


Millions of times, I told myself to not let it happened again, but I did. I neglected my own advice (as usual). This time, with him. I let him entered my heart, and watched as he slowly walked away, breaking every pieces that remained. Told myself that maybe, just maybe, he needed space. Comforting myself that maybe,just maybe, things will be alright again but it turned out wrong. By giving him space that he needed, I completely removed myself from his life as well.


But as I moved on, I realized that he is not worth my time, and not worth the tears I've cried for him. I told myself that I deserve better, I deserve more than this. A girl can dream, cant she? And I dream to be in love with a guy who loves me back, irrevocably and unconditionally. There were times when the thoughts of him lingered in my mind, disturbing the peace that I'm having, but in the end, its all just memories that couldnt be erased. I just have to accept the fact that how matter I wanted to rewind back the time, it is impossible to do so.

I have Allah, my family and friends. Each time my heart aches of remembering him, I turn to Allah. For as He listens to me, and bring ease to my heart. For each time I'm sad and devastated of all the memories keep haunting me down, I have my family and friends, for they never give up on me. Always gives support and hope. I thank them, whole heartedly.

You may come and go as you please, you my steal and break my heart. But I promise you this, as this will be the last time for I shall keep my heart for someone who deserves it better. It hurts to let go, but if it's for the best, why hold on to something when you know you can deserve something so much better?

 

Love, R!